Sometimes we're all too quick to count down the days, that we forget to make the days count.

I saw that on a facebook picture and decided that I wanted to write about that today, especially after the day I had.

I am always the one who looks forward to Friday by Tuesday or Wednesday, that there are times, I forget to "Stop & smell the roses".

Today, I woke up with a killer migraine, and those of you who know me, know that I have had only one migraine since I had my spinal leak back in March. It was so bad today. I took my migraine medicine, and then 2 hours later took another one, then an hour after that I took 2 Excedrin Migraine pills. My friend Julie checked with a pharmacist at work, to make sure it was ok to take it on top of my migraine medicine. I can only take 2 pills in 2 hours and then not again for 24 hours which totally stinks. IT didn't help which is rare, because it always helped before, the Excedrin migraine didn't help either, but Julie got me a Dr. Pepper, in hopes that the caffeine would help me. That helped a little, I still have my migraine. I'm going to go to sleep in a little while, but I wanted to write my blog for the night.

I cried my eyes out today. I discovered that although I was taking my medicine for my depression, I was taking 2 50 mg pills that are time released and instead of taking 1 in the  morning, and 1 in the later part of the day, I have been taking both in the morning! OMG, I had no idea, I'd get over loaded in the morning, and nothing the rest of the day! UGH! Needless to say, YAY for getting my 100 mg pills yesterday that I was able to start today! So hopefully by tomorrow I will be back to normal! I have been so sad, and depressed and oh just a mess! I have said things, that I would not have said had my hormones
not been out of whack. My loved ones understand and are very forgiving, and well, I hope they have all been forgiving, I guess I'll know later tonight if the one I emailed things too, if he forgives me! He's awesome and usually knows to ignore me when I get like this, and understands that I can't help it. I get very insecure and just beat up on myself! But I should be back to myself hopefully by tomorrow when I wake up!

So, today, my food stunk. All I ate today because I was nauseous, was a 1/2 protein bar mid morning. For lunch I had a salad with grilled chicken in it. And have had nothing else but water all day! I'm sick to my stomach and hope that by morning I'll be able to swallow my shake! I couldn't even swallow the shake this morning! :-( But that is mainly because of my migraine.

I have to say, I am so excited that I may only have 7 or 8 followers, but I Have had as high as 95 page views in a day, and run a consistent of at least 30 something each day that I write. I don't really keep track of that, but I happen to scope out the site for the blog to see what all I could access. So, I was glad I saw that. I am really only writing this to make myself accountable. But I am glad that I have so many people that read this, and also, glad that I get so many people who email me to show their support! I know it's hard to comment on here because you have to be  a member to do that.

Oh, so yesterday I wrote about a friend and I was maybe a little harsh. Well I was a lot harsh. I miss my friend terribly. I can't tell him, because I think he will think something else, when honestly, I just miss my friend and the way he made me feel! He made me smile all the time. Every time I talked to him, I was so grateful that he was my friend. The loss of this friend has hurt me terribly. And no matter what the reason, I will cherish the friendship we had. But I so, want to tell him how hurt I am. I honestly don't think he'd care! I really don't!
I have tried to email him so many times to say "Hey Friend, I miss you" and "I Miss the friendship we had" but I am afraid if I did send him the emails, he'd reject me. And then there is a part of me that wants to say to him, "HEY You have no idea how hurt I am!!" But regardless, he has his own life, and his own "Stuff" but if he ever reads this, I hope "HE" knows I am talking about him and if nothing else, I so miss our friendship & the fact that he accepted me for who I was & let me be me, even when he at times shook his head like I was crazy! He made me laugh all the time & made my life better just by being in it! So friend, I'm sorry for whatever has happened between us and I wish you nothing but the best in all you do! And I was so glad to have you as my friend!!

I'm so stubborn when I am hurt. It's easier for me to ignore someone and not be as friendly which is so hard for me, because I am so not like that!

Ugh, well before I get all mushy on here, I'm going to go!
I will write more tomorrow and I will have more to eat & write about!

Well I hope you all have a great evening!

God speed!
Jenn