Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
Watch your words, for they become actions.
Watch your actions, for they become habits.
Watch your habits, for they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.
- Anonymous
I love this saying.... I needed to share it today.
Today was a really different kind of day. I went to work, and it was a fairly good day. I had to leave early because I had to go to the neurosurgeon. I was really nervous about going because I was so unsure of what was going to happen and what the surgeon was going to say. I found out I was misdiagnosed and do not have Chiari Malformation 1. I actually have a birth defect in my skull that has caused the lower part of my brain to herniate outside my skull but it is not bad enough to do surgery and I need to have more tests done by the regular neurologist to find out what is causing my symptoms. It is actually possible that a lot of it is from stress.
It actually amazes me how much stress can do to cause damage in your life.
I guess the stress of going back to work ( I love my job) and having a boyfriend that lives in another state and not being able to see him as much as I would like or need too, raising a teenager alone, just doing everything alone. Don't get me wrong, I am not complaining. I have a great life, with great friends. I could have been married already (thank God I am not, and chose to run from my last relationship) but sometimes, even I get so stressed out, beyond anything I have ever experienced.
I think we all handle stress differently. Me, I need to get it out. I tend to almost vomit my words at people.I try so hard to not do that, but when I'm stressed to the max, I just say what is in my head or heart, and don't think first. Not always smart....
Anyway, so today, I wanted to celebrate having found out that I don't need brain surgery and I went through my pantry and through my fridge and freezer, and thought to myself, "NO YOU ARE NOT GOING TO DO THIS, YOU ARE NOT GOING TO EAT TO CELEBRATE!!! That is what I have always done. SO I thought about one of my guy friends at work, who continuously supports me and tells me how great I am doing! He reads this so he knows who he is! Thank you!!! I thought of all the compliments you continuously give me and that keeps me motivated. You really don't realize just how special your friendship is to me.
Then my girlfriends at work, Susan, and Julie, my 2 supporters of my lifestyle change, and let me not forget sweet Andrea and Liz my amazing pregnant friend, the 4 of them are the reason I love to go to work every day aside from my patients. They are the closest to me and are all like sisters to me but each on a different level. Our company says they are like a family, well I will tell you, these 4 ladies, are like family to me.
Lexi has her play this week, she is so stressed out on top of making sure all her homework is done, and her chores are done, she is just not herself with me. She's been really short with me, and it's almost hurtful. She doesn't mean it & I know it, but she also had the stress of my bad spinal tap. And she has been so worried about me, now she doesn't have to be! Thank God, and we can go away knowing I am ok, and we will have the greatest time together.
Well I have stuck to my program. I am feeling so good!!
I feel like I am looking good too!
I am hoping to go out again this weekend since Lexi has a late night Saturday night after her show. They have an after party. Gonna be a late night!!!
Well I hope you all have a great evening. I've been kind of stagnant on my weight loss. going to go on the scale again tomorrow! Will see what it shows now.
Godspeed!
Jenn
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